Time for a blog post. Things had been good or maybe just the distance between the bad parts had grown. The bad parts usually involving drink. But today I have had enough. I have finally learnt my sense of worth. It was the pathetic hiding of his phone when no doubt telling the love of his life how much he loves her and misses her that really killed it for me. He probably thinks I should be grateful that he is making a rather slow effort to hide it rather than doing it openly when he is lying next to me in bed. But imagine it, if you can, from my point of view. The man who is supposed to be the love of my life looking at the sofa at the side of him whilst he does whatever on his phone and then trying to hide, as if from a parent, what he is doing. Like a knife to the heart. He doesn't have to hide it from me. He just needs to say goodbye. Because whether he says it finally or whether I withdraw into my protective shell the outcome will still be the same but one will be the slow destroying path we have already trodden. But one difference. I have learnt my sense of worth. And if you or him or anyone else personally don't think I'm worthy that's fine. Each are entitled to their opinion. But on this journey I have learnt a lot about myself and I am more than worthy. I offer an enormous amount (not being like typical women) and I will not have my feelings trodden on anymore. I guess it is time to start treating myself with the respect I deserve. Time for that to happen on the work front also. And on that note as I pull into the station on the way to work it's time to start now. Another step on the road to Me Discovering Me.
